Wednesday, April 16, 2014

Punctuation According to Johnny Cannon

I reckon probably the biggest difference between writing and talking is along the matter of punctuation. ‘Cause when you’re talking, you don’t really give no nevermind to whether or not you done put a comma where it’s supposed to go or whether it’s YOUR or YOU’RE. But brother, if you get a punctuation mark wrong when you’re writing, you can bet your sweet bippy that Mrs. Buttke is going to make her red pen pee all over your paper.

So, here’s what I’ve done. I made myself a list of punctuation marks and what they do. I’ll give you the list here, and then I’ll get into each one with a little more spit and polish later.

Commas Separate
Apostrophes Replace
Colons Introduce
Semicolons Link
Periods End
Exclamation Marks Shout
Question Marks Ask
Quotation Marks Say
Parenthesis Whisper
Dashes Interrupt
Hyphens Glue

So, there you go. Hopefully that’ll hold you over until I can start looking at each one. If not, well dadgummit, go look it up or something. For crying out loud.

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